Help a struggling Stroke Survivor

As many people who follow me will know I am a 48 year old Stroke Survivor.

Now 2 years on I am struggling financially, I am still physically and mentally unable to work.

Much though I hate to do this I am asking for the kind help of individuals out there.

Please donate whatever you can to my PayPal account andyhill242@gmail.com or my Payza account andy@information-online.co.uk
or even my BitCoin Account 1BsUZ1ApscWVHoY4V5DvfHx9qGVYPKx7Br

Thank you in desperation

Andy

The Paralympics and attitude towards the disabled.

Wheelchair basketball at the 2008 Summer Paralympics (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
The paralympics have, as always, shown us some fantastic triumphs over adversity. It is important to view these people as athletes not as disabled people and on the whole I think the coverage has portrayed them in this way.
There have been reports that the games have given the public an improved view of disabled people in general.
However, and pardon my skepticism, it remains to be seen whether this is true and whether this improved attitude will continue.
I am newly disabled myself, since my stroke in November 2010. Thankfully, I have not personally received any serious abuse but have had people barge past me, walk straight at me and mutter as they pass me in public places.
However there is a lot of well documented cases of disabled abuse, including some particularly disturbing ones in this report Hidden in plain sight.
I think it is time that disabled abuse gets the same protection in law as racist abuse.
Dr A Hill

Prisms of the Mind - Available in paperback.

Prisms of the Mind (The second book in my surviving a Stroke trilogy) now available in paperback...

Buy it on Amazon now.

Currently books available.

Here is a list of my books currently available on Amazon...

"I've been lucky really"
       Kindle   Paperback

Prisms of the Mind
       Kindle

One Year on
       Kindle

There is sometimes a happy ending
      Kindle  Paperback

Heros often fail
      Kindle   Paperback

Please dig deep to help a struggling Stroke Survivor.

Financial Woes

Having a bit of an ongoing financial crisis at the moment.

Anyone know of a quick legitimate work from home job, part / flexible time working less than 15 hours per week?

Alternatively anyone want to give . loan me £1000???

The great Global Warming Conspiricy

As many of the so called Global Warming claims get debunked, the latest being that the Antarctic Ice shelves are not in fact shrinking at all, as has been proven by a recent field study, which has proved the 20 year old computer model on which the ice shrinkage claims were based, to be wrong. I can't help but think that when all the global warming scare stories started about 15 years ago, the warnings that our fossil fuel resources were dwindling, a very real claim, faded from view.
Is it that the dwindling resources claim failed to achieve a global slowdown on resource usage. So a new horror story to try to reduce our fossil fuel usage was brought out, Global Warming!

The truth is that natural resources are dwindling far to quickly and we need to cut our usage and sure the planet is warming up, it's bound to we are still coming out of the last ice age. But the changes are not happening as fast as they claim and mankind's effect on the changes are pretty insignificant!

Raspberry Pi

I have recently taken delivery of my first Raspberry Pi evaluation board.http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Raspberry_pi 
I have it running Debian Linux with xtightvncserver, now I have solved a routing problem with my windows machine it has an internet connection.

It's a great little machine, look forward to integrating it with my various projects, may even look at a Pi cluster!

Reiki

Had a Reiki treatment from my friend who is a qualified Reiki practitioner today.

It was a particularly good session which left us both with a great sense of well being.
There are 2 effects which may be attributed to the Reiki energy, first my IBS which was beginning to flare up settled down and second the solution to a routing problem which had been bugging me for days came to me in a flash of inspiration.

Mock if you like disbelievers!

Computer upgrades

I finished a computer upgrade this week which effectively doubled the processing power of my number crunching machine"Thor", Known as "Thor2" it consists of a second cabinet with second quad core processor and 4 Gb ram connected together by a 1Gbit interconnect.
I managed to achieve this all on my own, with no help and no deva strops, so I'm quite pleased.

For pictures of the build see https://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.248738255223979.52416.100002634190089&type=3

I don't need councilling

I went to have my assessment with my councilor and she decided that the way I was dealing with my anxiety was correct. She gave me a big leaflet on coping strategies and was going to recommend to my GP an increase in SSRI dose if I thought it was necessary, she also said that I could always ask my GP for a referral back if necessary.
So overall I'm happy with the outcome.
I just have to learn to accept that I am not so good at coping with things since the stroke.

I've got to see a shrink....

Went to see my GP today and we have decided that he's going to refer me for therapy rather than increasing my SSRI dose to try to sort out my inability to cope with hassles.
Good news is that the DWP have notified my GP that I no longer need sick notes.

Another year older...

...and the grave yawns yet wider! It's only being cheerful that keeps me going!

It was my birthday on Monday.
Birthdays have a greater significance now, another year I'm glad to be alive.
Seeing GP tomorrow, looking at upping my SSRI dose, see if we can get on top of the anxiety that still lurks below the surface. Hopefully I will then be able to cope with things better.

WRAG update

I have now received official notification of the outcome of my medical examination.
I have now been classified as severely disabled and my ESA benefit has been increased, including backpay.

The only proviso is that I have to attend job focus interviews from time to time first one being 16th April, as I am classified as someone who will eventually be able to return to work.

I am happy with this outcome at the moment.

Work related activity group

I've been summoned to the job centre on 16th April.

Apparently I have been put in the work related activity group following my medical, whatever that is?!

I've still not had anything in writing though.

Wonder what that will be all about, hope it's something I can cope with and it doesn't make my head explode!

They made me a Doctor!

Not been blogging for a while, but I'm still here, still OK.

A lot seems to have been happening, not least gaining my Ph.D. I had been working on it for a few years, obviously having a stroke set things back a bit, and I was unable to continue with my work.
However it was decided that taking my previous work and my past experience into account, I had achieved the necessary standard.
Enjoying the extra mobility of having a car again, but I do find driving tiring and a little painful after a period of time, so just short journeys  at the  moment.
I had my medical for the DWP, not too bad, just concentrated on my mental and cognitive state and the movement on my affected side. Just got to wait to see what they come back with now. My GP still believes I am unfit for work anyway.

Trip to office

I'm taking a trip over to my old office tomorrow, to pick up what remains of my stuff over there.

It is still uncertain if and when I will be fit to return to work.

Motability Car

Finally picked up my motability car today.
It's great to be driving again, but driving 1 handed and getting used to the adapted controls will take a bit of getting used to.

Another step forward!

DWP medical examination

I have been summoned to attend a DWP medical examination on Saturday 10th of March.

I have nothing to hide of course, but it's an additional anxiety I could do without!
Why isn't my own doctors word and the medical questionnaire  I filled in enough?

Book in print

My book "There is Sometime a Happy Ending" is now available in printed form.https://www.createspace.com/3785189

Want to earn money from your computer?

There are many ways to earn money on the internet, I have filtered out a few that seem to work.

Why not give it a try yourself? http://makingcash-online.co.uk

Freedom

Finally the snow has melted and I was able to walk down to the end of the road again this morning.

It fair wore me out!
After over a week without any proper walking exercise, it was a bit of a shock to the system.
Hopefully we have seen the end of it for this year now!

6C

The temperature has hit the heady heights of 6C


It's been above freezing 2 hours now and the snow is finally melting!

Hooray!!  I'll not be a prisoner in the house for much longer!!

Anithistamines!!??

Took an Antihistamine this morning. Following bouts of random eye watering over the last couple of days. Surely my hay fever can't be starting already!? Although it does seem to start earlier and earlier in the past few years.


I take 10mg of ceterizine, in the morning. At the moment I'm taking the Di-hydrochloride form, which seems to make me more tired than the hydrochloride form.

Any medical or chemistry experts care to explain that one??

Still Penned In

The snow is still hanging around, so I'm avoiding going out still.
Still doing my physio, Brain training and generally keeping myself busy though.
Working on a new book "Heroes Often Fail"

Still Snow

Snow's still hanging about, although thankfully no more has added to it. Still staying indoors to be safe.
Take care if you have to go out there!

My dad has to got for radiotherapy today, hope he gets there and back OK.

SNOW

I'm not going out there until it's all gone!!

Actually my elderly father has cleared the snow to my bins and bird table, how wrong way round is that??

So the bins are emptied and the birds fed, that's all, I have no intention of ruining a years worth of recovery bt a fall in the snow!

Arm Improvements

My arm and hand have improved a lot in the last 3 months compared to the progress up to that point.

Steady improvements are continuing steadily too, noticeable almost daily.
Subtle improvements in dexterity, strength and move-ability.

All my ebooks on special offer

All my ebooks on special offer! http://t.co/dlVWFCCH

Visio

If you want to make your head scream, and drive yourself to the edge of a mental fit.
Use a Microsoft office product.
SCREEESHHHHHH!

I think this is a genuine internet oppertunity

http://andyhill24.cellsqueez.hop.clickbank.net/

OK it looks and sounds like just another scam.
I looked at it many times before I was convinced.

I've decide to give it a try myself.
Whilst I think the claims of instant income and the figures mentioned are a definite best case scenario, I do believe that you can make a steady income with it.

Give it a try!

Watercooling Phase 2 - Update

This project seems to be growing out of control, in fact I think it's got second system syndrome, even though really it's only phase 2 of my first system. (Readers of The Mythical Man Month will understand this).

I've now ordered

Bay reservoir
2nd HDD water block

And plan to also add


2 * Temperature Monitor, (inlet and outlet)
Inline filter (possible)


I'm reckoning construction will be a 3 day project in the summer.

Boiler Fault

My boiler stopped working this morning, which caused me a bit of panic, lighting gas fires and digging out 2 electric radiators.

But they have been out and got it going again, with the proviso that it may need a new controller board.
Still, all at no cost to me... The joys of rental property!

Making money online

Coming to terms with the fact that I may never be able to return to my old job or even a similar type of job, and bearing in mind I might only be able to work part time. I have been looking at the various ways to make money online.

Sure there are a lot of scams out there, the get rich quick schemes, you quickly learn to spot these a mile off.
But there are some genuine ones.

So far I have found.
Making money for being online. -Gomez Peer Zone.
OK you are never going to make a fortune from this but why not make a few $$$ / £££ for something you are doing anyway?

Affiliates - a lot of online companies will give you a commission on selling their products.  It's online selling with no stock, no deliveries and no hassle!

Google Adsense - get paid for showing adverts on your site. If you have an active Youtube account you can put them on there.

Also why not try a bit of writing, it's free and easy to publish for Amazon Kindle

All of these could make you a bit of supplemental money, why not give them a try?

See my Latest Special Offers

https://www.facebook.com/AndyHill242?sk=notes

Amazon Kindle Full Colour - Bargain Price

https://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=198621316902340

Water cooling - Phase 2

I am gradually getting the components together for phase 2 of my watercooling project.
Components delivered or on order so far.

Tubing
Hose clips
Water block for second GPU
Water block for RAM
Water block for Northbridge
Water Block for Southbridge
Water block for HDD
Flow Monitor

Components still to order.

Bay reservoir
2nd HDD water block (possibly)
Coolant

I'm not planning to do the work until July, but I'm getting the components as and when I can afford them.

Reiki

Had a Reiki treatment from my good friend today.
Whatever your feelings on these alternative treatments should keep and open mind. Since my last treatment 4-5 months ago my arm has improved significantly.

The energy flowed very well and I felt a deep sense of calm and well being!

GP visit

My GP was supportive of my feelings of not been ready for work and said he would be supportive if contacted by the DWP.

I explained my fears of being forced back to work when not ready.

So that's that stress out of the way.

Goodbye Chrome Hello Firefox

Ever the fickle browser fan, I have just ditched Chrome and started using Firefox again.

For sometime now Chrome had been giving me mysterious DNS errors, and finally today I got an error 2 when trying to load both facebook and twitter. So for the time at least Firefox Rules!!!

More computer issues

Had problems with the system volume filling up this morning, called for a bit of reorganisation.
The joys of running a development machine!

Managed to take it in my stride though, only minor amount of frustration and anxiety!

Better today

Much more in control today.
Even had a major computer issue to deal with but managed to stay calm.
I need to work out what triggers the loss of control.
I'm off to GP on tuesday anyway.

Bit of a downer

My heads off screaming tonight. A lot of stupid little things are all spinning round in my head.
Health questionnaires to fill in, doctors to convince I'm still not fit for work, people not listening to me.

At least I am able to bring it all under control now. Thank God I'm on SSRIs!

All this has made me feel a bit down, but it's coming under control now, after a txt chat with my bestest friend.

DWP Medical Form

I've had a medical questionnaire to fill in from the DWP. I've been expecting one for a while, chance to let them know just how I am.
Hope I don't get called in for a face to face exam though, that is anxiety I could do without! 

Agitation

I'll be glad when I can get these agitation issues sorted out.
A typical computer scenario happened earlier where trying to deal with one problem escalated into several problems, requiring a reboot, not a 2 minute job on this machine!

All this resulted in a bit of a melt down. But I managed to bring it under control without breaking anything or harming myself so it was kind of a result!

Once again I repeat my mantra "Don't ever have a strike, they're rubbish!"

Never Enough Disk Space

In spite of having 9TB total disk space on my main machine, I still needed to do some housekeeping on 3 of the drives this morning!

Watching a program I recorded before Christmas.
It seems weird seeing all the Christmas ads!

Doctors Appointment

I've made an appointment with my GP for a week next Tuesday.

It's for kind of a review, and to get my medical certificate renewed. Also I want to see if there is any therapy or treatment I can get for my short term memory and concentration problems, other than to keep working on it as I already am.

I feel it will be a good few months yet before I am fit for work. With the anxiety lurking just under the surface any kind of pressure or hassle, just instantly gets me upset and frustrated and unable to handle the situation.

My fear is that the doctor will decide, that in spite all of this, I am fit for work. The thought of this just fills me with anxiety.

Surely he can't think this, he has to listen to how I feel!

Anxious times....

Don't ever have a Stroke, they're rubbish!...

New book available

My newest book There is Sometimes a Happy Ending is now available on Kindle Here

There is Sometimes a Happy Ending

My newest book, There is Sometimes a Happy Ending, is almost ready for publication.... Available soon on Amazon Kindle...

DWP disabled work advisor

Got on OK today with the DWP, they won't do anything about getting me back into work as long as I am on the sick. Going for a review with the doctor in a couple of weeks.

On the subject of DWP, my ESA payment is late this week, if it's not in tomorrow, I'm on the phone to them!

3D Animation

I've come across an interesting looking 3D Animation package,  
http://fa1bbwqa5asf-1herf6qlhptok.hop.clickbank.net/
I'll probably give it a try, bit of therapy.

Motability Car

Heard from the garage today, there has been a delay on my car, apparently the latest estimate is 10th Feb.

There's nothing I can do but wait, apparently the body has been built and it's about to start on the assembly line. This is what you get for ordering a Ferrari I guess :-D

Still I feel like I've waited for this car longer than Hadrian waited for his wall!

Editing, editing, editing

Spent a lot of time today editing my book, it's tiring and tedious work, but at the same time fascinating.
This manuscript is nearly 20 years old, it's like an insight into my life back then, a life which has now gone!

Re weigh

After weighing myself again today, and looking back through my records, I have put on a kilo over Christmas, which is not too bad I guess!

DWP return to work

I have a meeting next Tuesday with the local DWP return to work specialist, to see what help is available to try to overcome my mental (cognitive) issues.
Of course I'm feeling a bit apprehensive about it. I'm thinking, probably wrongly that I will be pressured to return to work, in any case no doubt it will be a stressful experience.

Violent Squall

Had to abandon my walk this morning as a violent squall blew up and I got soaked and hailed on, whilst emptying the bins.
I'll go later when it's calmed down a bit.

Bloody weather, still it's better than snow, just!

On my own again

My cousin has gone now, so I'm on my own again.
It's nice to have company, but I'm looking forward to being able to get back into my own routine again.

Still got loads of editing to do on my current book.
I'm also finding myself bit's of work to do to try to assess what I am still capable of.

2012 Predictions

1. The World will NOT end in 2012

• I think you'll find that the Mayans predicted a time of great change and enlightenment
• I think you will find that the comet Elenin was itself destroyed during it's last pass of the sun

    2. The worldwide economic situation will get worse before it gets better

• The Euro will collapse
• House prices will continue to fall
• Unemployment will continue to rise

  3. The olympics will be a target for terrorist threats, possibly even an attack

  4. The government will continue to make it difficult for disabled people by cutting benefits.